Introducing Mindfulness
Mindfulness helps us uncover the confidence and power that comes from being present
“Between the stimulus and the response there is a space, and in that space is your power and your freedom.” Viktor Frankl
Our lives are so busy that we often switch to autopilot just to get through the day. While unconscious decision making is helpful for routine tasks – where we can trust that doing the same thing unthinkingly will achieve the result we’re after - it’s not helpful in relationships, when we need to be creative, or when the unexpected happens. The quote above from Viktor Frankl, the Austrian psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, suggests that if we can catch ourselves gearing up to react to an event in our usual knee-jerk way and instead choose to pause – then we create a space that allows for a skilful, creative and fresh response to emerge. We can recognise that our power and freedom are in those spacious moments.
Mindfulness practices offer us that opportunity - to pause, see the world clearly, and respond skilfully.
Why?
Because when we practice mindfulness:
- we start to see when our thought patterns and storylines are creating a world of worry and distraction, and contributing to our stress and suffering.
- we begin to notice when, and how, our environment is impacting on us and that insight offers us the opportunity to do something about it.
How?
Mindfulness practices, such as meditation, make use of meta cognition or our ability to watch our thought processes, judgements and story lines – without being caught up in them.
NB: In mindfulness practices we’re not trying to stop our thoughts – we’re training to stop them influencing us.
Mindfulness reveals how what we think is true – often isn’t.
Example 1: Do you remember the dress that became a viral internet sensation? Those of us that saw it as blue and black couldn’t believe that others saw it as white and gold. They had to be wrong. What if this is happening all the time?
Example 2: What do you see?
Mindfulness helps us uncover the confidence and power that comes from being present
“Between the stimulus and the response there is a space, and in that space is your power and your freedom.” Viktor Frankl
Our lives are so busy that we often switch to autopilot just to get through the day. While unconscious decision making is helpful for routine tasks – where we can trust that doing the same thing unthinkingly will achieve the result we’re after - it’s not helpful in relationships, when we need to be creative, or when the unexpected happens. The quote above from Viktor Frankl, the Austrian psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, suggests that if we can catch ourselves gearing up to react to an event in our usual knee-jerk way and instead choose to pause – then we create a space that allows for a skilful, creative and fresh response to emerge. We can recognise that our power and freedom are in those spacious moments.
Mindfulness practices offer us that opportunity - to pause, see the world clearly, and respond skilfully.
Why?
Because when we practice mindfulness:
- we start to see when our thought patterns and storylines are creating a world of worry and distraction, and contributing to our stress and suffering.
- we begin to notice when, and how, our environment is impacting on us and that insight offers us the opportunity to do something about it.
How?
Mindfulness practices, such as meditation, make use of meta cognition or our ability to watch our thought processes, judgements and story lines – without being caught up in them.
NB: In mindfulness practices we’re not trying to stop our thoughts – we’re training to stop them influencing us.
Mindfulness reveals how what we think is true – often isn’t.
Example 1: Do you remember the dress that became a viral internet sensation? Those of us that saw it as blue and black couldn’t believe that others saw it as white and gold. They had to be wrong. What if this is happening all the time?
Example 2: What do you see?
Perhaps you see two faces? Perhaps a vase?
Our mind wants to make sense of a confusing world, so it is constantly searching for patterns. How we interpret those patterns is influenced by our previous experiences or the conventions we’ve learned – our class, education, sex or race for example. Mindfulness helps us recognise those influences.
Example 3: Have you ever walked into a darkened room and seen a ‘shape’ on the floor and noticed your body switching into a flight, fight, freeze reaction? Our mind is wired to keep us safe. In the past if we saw a curled shape on the ground there wasn’t time to debate whether it was a rope or a snake – we needed to run away quickly or hit it with a big stick. That reaction saved us then. Today this tendency for our mind to jump to conclusions doesn’t serve us so well.
Getting to know the body.
If mindfulness is about meta cognition, and recognising that our thoughts are not facts, why are we invited to drop into the body?
This is because:
Our attention is usually on our discursive mind; following our worries, judgments and storylines. So in mindfulness were invited to place our attention on something else – and notice the difference that makes. To become aware of the physical sensation of sitting on a chair or what it feels like to breathe for example. Of course our attention will be drawn back onto our thoughts and storylines - and when we notice this we gently guide it back to the breath or body.
Exercise: What’s happening in your left knee? What sensations do you notice here? Is there tension, pulsing, pain?
What about the tip of your nose? What do you notice here? Perhaps coolness as the breath enters, and warmth as you exhale?
How is your right ear – is it itchy or numb? If you’re wearing an earring can you feel it’s weight?
Presumably you noticed something move? That’s your attention. In mindfulness we develop the ability to notice where our attention is, and then choose what we want to attend to.
The body is a useful source of information.
Tight shoulders can let us know, early, that our stress reactions are kicking in. Or a churning stomach indicates that we’re experiencing anxiety. If we can recognise this, then we can respond appropriately.
NB: Not having access to the body is like driving a car without a dashboard. We’re moving but we don’t know how fast we’re going, what the temperature of the engine is, or if we have enough fuel.
Body and mind are connected.
Exercise 1: Our thoughts affect our body
Imagine that you’re in your kitchen and on the counter there is a cutting board, a lemon and a knife.
Imagine picking up the heavy knife, and slicing the cool lemon it in half.
Now imagine taking a bite out of that lemon. What happens?
Is your mouth watering?
If just thinking about a lemon can make your mouth react, can you imagine how worries or regrets might affect our bodies too?
Exercise 2: Our body affects our feelings and emotions
Try gripping your hands tightly in a fist. Perhaps curling over so your body is hunched up with your head curving towards your knees – how does that feel? Can you breathe easily? Is there tension? How does this posture affect how you feel about yourself?
Now straighten up, allow your body to settle. Feeling your spine rising up, and your shoulders relax.
How do you feel now?
NB: There’s been a lot of debate around Amy Cuddy’s research on body posture and the impact it has on our hormones but generally we can agree that if we have a strong, balanced, upright posture we feel more open and relaxed and our breath and energy can circulate more freely.
So let’s put all this into practice…
The Breathing space – a short practice you can do anywhere.
NB: This practice could take 30 minutes, 3 minutes or just 30 seconds. You can use it to check in with how you are doing throughout the day, or when you catch yourself gearing up to respond to a situation in a habitual, knee-jerk way.
Our mind wants to make sense of a confusing world, so it is constantly searching for patterns. How we interpret those patterns is influenced by our previous experiences or the conventions we’ve learned – our class, education, sex or race for example. Mindfulness helps us recognise those influences.
Example 3: Have you ever walked into a darkened room and seen a ‘shape’ on the floor and noticed your body switching into a flight, fight, freeze reaction? Our mind is wired to keep us safe. In the past if we saw a curled shape on the ground there wasn’t time to debate whether it was a rope or a snake – we needed to run away quickly or hit it with a big stick. That reaction saved us then. Today this tendency for our mind to jump to conclusions doesn’t serve us so well.
Getting to know the body.
If mindfulness is about meta cognition, and recognising that our thoughts are not facts, why are we invited to drop into the body?
This is because:
Our attention is usually on our discursive mind; following our worries, judgments and storylines. So in mindfulness were invited to place our attention on something else – and notice the difference that makes. To become aware of the physical sensation of sitting on a chair or what it feels like to breathe for example. Of course our attention will be drawn back onto our thoughts and storylines - and when we notice this we gently guide it back to the breath or body.
Exercise: What’s happening in your left knee? What sensations do you notice here? Is there tension, pulsing, pain?
What about the tip of your nose? What do you notice here? Perhaps coolness as the breath enters, and warmth as you exhale?
How is your right ear – is it itchy or numb? If you’re wearing an earring can you feel it’s weight?
Presumably you noticed something move? That’s your attention. In mindfulness we develop the ability to notice where our attention is, and then choose what we want to attend to.
The body is a useful source of information.
Tight shoulders can let us know, early, that our stress reactions are kicking in. Or a churning stomach indicates that we’re experiencing anxiety. If we can recognise this, then we can respond appropriately.
NB: Not having access to the body is like driving a car without a dashboard. We’re moving but we don’t know how fast we’re going, what the temperature of the engine is, or if we have enough fuel.
Body and mind are connected.
Exercise 1: Our thoughts affect our body
Imagine that you’re in your kitchen and on the counter there is a cutting board, a lemon and a knife.
Imagine picking up the heavy knife, and slicing the cool lemon it in half.
Now imagine taking a bite out of that lemon. What happens?
Is your mouth watering?
If just thinking about a lemon can make your mouth react, can you imagine how worries or regrets might affect our bodies too?
Exercise 2: Our body affects our feelings and emotions
Try gripping your hands tightly in a fist. Perhaps curling over so your body is hunched up with your head curving towards your knees – how does that feel? Can you breathe easily? Is there tension? How does this posture affect how you feel about yourself?
Now straighten up, allow your body to settle. Feeling your spine rising up, and your shoulders relax.
How do you feel now?
NB: There’s been a lot of debate around Amy Cuddy’s research on body posture and the impact it has on our hormones but generally we can agree that if we have a strong, balanced, upright posture we feel more open and relaxed and our breath and energy can circulate more freely.
So let’s put all this into practice…
The Breathing space – a short practice you can do anywhere.
NB: This practice could take 30 minutes, 3 minutes or just 30 seconds. You can use it to check in with how you are doing throughout the day, or when you catch yourself gearing up to respond to a situation in a habitual, knee-jerk way.
Step 1: Finding a posture that makes you feel awake, open, strong and dignified.
Step 2: Ask yourself: ‘What’s going on with me in this moment?’
What body sensations are here right now? Perhaps scanning the body to pick up any tightness or bracing. NB: The invitation here is to simply acknowledge these sensations, (which will introduce a sense of space and fluidity). We’re not trying to change them, (that tends to add more tension and solidifies our experience).
What feelings are here? Again acknowledging what you find without trying to make them different.
What thoughts are going through the mind? If possible not getting caught in the storylines – simply observing them like clouds passing across the sky.
NB: It’s important to bring gentleness, compassion and curiosity to whatever we find.
Step 3: Gather your attention on the sensations of breathing.
Not ‘thinking’ about the breath, but becoming aware of what it feels like to breathe.
NB: If you notice your mind has wandered, which it will do, simply bringing your attention back to the breath.
Step 4: Expand your attention back out into the whole of your body and continue with your day. Perhaps asking yourself “What would be helpful to do NOW?” Not worrying about the next 50 things - just the next thing that needs your attention in THIS moment.